Saturday, May 16, 2009

Good news and sunshine!

And lots of it.

We've got more than 18 hours of sun per day now and still increasing.

Even better, the mammograms turned out fine. Interestingly, it was a fairly pleasant experience because the tech was funny and kind and let me look at the digital images as they came up. I haven't got a lot of breast tissue, and they wanted her to get images all the way into the muscle wall, so I'm still a bit battered, but very relieved.

I'm also puzzled that nothing showed up when there definitely are masses of something -- and not just in the left breast as I'd thought. Still, they'd also ordered an ultrasound (which I didn't expect) and the radiologist came in during that to reassure me and let me know I should just pay attention and get another exam in about 6 months. I wish I'd thought to ask about a connection between Sjogren's and whatever the masses might be, but I'll ask my regular doc.

It has been gloomy and chilly for the past week or so, but the sun is amazing today. I'm headed into Fairbanks to make some deliveries and then to pick up some bedding plants. Yep, it's still too early, but I put them in containers and can drag them indoors if I need to at night. I'll just get the cheapie stuff from Fred Meyers today; next weekend it will be time for a trip out to Plant Kingdom for the good stuff.

Thursday was the first day I've felt human in quite awhile: In addition to the stress over the cancer issue, I really did overdo it on production for an order. But that's gone now, and I'm going to do my best to enjoy this beautiful afternoon. Maybe a walk in Creamer's Field is in order, since I'll be in town anyway. And G. and I need to drive down to the Chena and take a look. Can't believe we haven't done that yet.

I wish I could learn to take potentially bad news as just that: potential, and not immediately assume the worst. But I'm a little like a rubber band that's been stretched a few times too many, and I don't have the resilience anymore. I'm hoping rest and conscious pursuit of the good and beautiful in this life will bring some of that back.

Thank you, everyone, for helping me through this. Your kindness and reassurance helped me keep a lid on some of the crazy, and I knew that even if it came to the worst, I wasn't alone. Much love to you all.

1 comment:

Orion Designs said...

I'm breathing a great big sigh of relief for you.

Enjoy the sun and select some awesome plants!
Vicki